Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
do herpes really smell.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize