So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
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