so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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