Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i already hear my dad disowning me
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Randomize
