The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
