I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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