you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize