oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
