Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
