yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
