Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
