Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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