Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Randomize
