I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize
