David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
