I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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