It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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