the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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