Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
