one might say we're banned from that church
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
i think i just lost a toe
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
