We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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