Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
