I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
i already hear my dad disowning me
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize