dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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