..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
