from now on my penis is your penis
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize
