Fine. I'll sleep in my office
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize