I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
