I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize