in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
