Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
