Where did you get a picture of my penis
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I checked into jail on foursquare
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
