nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
