Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
