Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize