Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
