Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
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