i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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