Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
