Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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