I will die if light touches me.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
