the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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