We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
