i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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