question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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