Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
