would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
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