So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
