He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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