dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
