You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
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having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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