I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
